Do you know someone who always seems to have it together? That friend, family member or co-worker, who just seems to bounce back effortlessly from every set-back? Does it make you nuts that you never see them sweat?
Most of us do know someone like that and while it can make us feel a bit envious of them, deep down, we all want to know their secret weapon.
Resiliency. That’s it. They’re known as “highly resilient people” and they’re like the Energizer Bunny, because they keep going and going and going…
Highly resilient people have a lot in common and possess many traits and habits that help them to bounce back with relative ease. Luckily, none of those traits are from a magic elixir, which means that if we really want to, any one of us can become a highly resilient person. Here are seven common traits these super-humans have in common:
1. They Know Who They Are
Resilient people are able to develop a true sense of who they are and they know what really matters to them in their life. They’re comfortable with who they are and as such, they’re not easily swayed by external influences. This highly evolved sense of self enables resilient people to reach their full potential, because they’re able to draw from their inner-strength to deflect criticism, ridicule and other external negativity.
Lesson we can learn: You can’t please everyone, so don’t bother to try. Figure out who you are in this world and just be that person to the best of your ability. No one is perfect, and that includes those who would judge you.
2. They Always Look For the Positive
Obstacles and set-backs are an inevitable part of life and when things don’t go according to plan, resilient people are prepared because they accept this fact of life. Resilient people have the ability to remain undeterred in pursuing their goals, because they view set-backs as a learning opportunity, and not as a finality to their hopes and aspirations.
Lesson we can learn: Accept that set-backs happen, be prepared for them, learn from them and don’t take them personally — move on, keep going.
3. They Take A Long-term View on Life
Whereas most people seek short-term, quick fixes in life, resilient people tend to have a life-plan that is consistent, yet flexible. Resilient people recognize that anything worthwhile in life doesn’t always come easy — they pre-plan what effort they need to make in order to get where they want to be.
Lesson we can learn: What we want in our future is in large part dependent on what efforts we make today. Short-term satisfaction will only carry us so far, so a clear life-plan is essential.
4. They Have a Highly Evolved Sense Of Purpose
Highly resilient people believe in something. In addition to self-confidence, resilient people seek out and work toward a purpose in life and often have a belief in a higher power. Their self-confidence and sense of purpose help them to stand on their own two feet and they’re less susceptible to relying on others for their motivation. Highly resilient people don’t focus on the mundane in life, but instead, see the bigger picture.
Lesson we can learn: Life is what we make it. Having a passion and living life to the fullest is vital to being a happy person.
5. They’re Okay With Not Having All the Answers
The highly resilient understand that not knowing how to do something, is not the same as not being able to do something. Resilient people aren’t afraid to admit they don’t (yet) know how to do something and they’re willing to learn. They realize it might be a challenge, and even scary, but if it’s something they want to do, they will learn.
Lesson we can learn: Don’t be afraid to admit you don’t know how to do something or that you don’t know the answer — embrace the love of learning and living and of trying new and exciting things that will better your life.
6. They Maintain Meaningful Connections
Resilient people are exceptionally good at having healthy relationships at home, work and in the community. Resilient people avoid negative relationships and seek out connections with like-minded people — as a result, they have mutually beneficial friendships, are more engaged and inspired.
Lesson we can learn: Choose your friends carefully. Build bonds with positive, engaging people who will be there for you, as you will be for them.
7. They Know How to Decompress and Recharge
Few, if any, are immune to life’s pressures and stresses. Resilient people however, being keenly aware of this, develop a healthy approach to dealing with stress and anxiety. Highly resilient people figure out what habits, techniques or methods best help them to relax and they do them regularly. Whether it’s prayer, meditation, a hobby or long walks in the woods, resilient people regularly recharge and refocus their mental and physical well-being.
Lesson we can learn: We can’t do it all, so don’t try. Taking on too much and ignoring the warning signs of stress is unhealthy. Find out what relaxes and recharges you, and make sure to do those things that de-stress your life.
Success is seldom a straight and easy path. To achieve success in life, it usually takes dedication and hard work — but, it also takes resiliency. The ability to learn from mistakes and recover from set-backs, is essential. Try adopting one of the seven traits each month, until you’ve made them part of your mind-set. Then keep going and bear in mind, negative people are hardly, if ever, resilient people.