I think a lot of people today easily confuse superficial friendships with real ones. We may think we have lots of true friends because we have 1,000 Facebook friends or 855 Twitter followers. There is however, very different types of friendships.
I do know quite a few people who sort of brag about how many friends they have — mostly, they mean their “friends” on social media and more often than not, 90% of those “relationships” are actually acquaintances and not real, deep friendships.
“A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.” – Walter Winchell
I tossed out the 90% stat because that’s just a guess. But in reality, if a person has 1,000 Facebook friends, is it plausible that only about 100 of those people are actually true friends? Could it be more? Sure. Is it probably less? I think so. After all, having 100 truly close friends whom we share our most inner most self with, is a pretty big number. Friendships can come in all forms, but most of us strive to have a tight knit group of people that we can truly rely on — those people who “get us” and who know us at our worst and best.
I read this story about friendships and it made me realize that with friends, its not the number, but the quality that matters most:
Simple Friends vs. Real Friends
A simple friend has never seen you cry.
A real friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.
A simple friend doesn’t know your parents’ first names.
A real friend has their phone numbers in his address book.
A simple friend brings a bottle of wine to your party.
A real friend comes early to help you cook and clean.
A simple friend hates it when you call after he has gone to bed.
A real friend asks you why you took so long to call.
A simple friend seeks to talk with you about their problems.
A real friend seeks to help you with your problems.
A simple friend wonders about your romantic history.
A real friend could blackmail you with it.
A simple friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A real friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.
A simple friend thinks the friendship is over when you have an argument.
A real friend knows that it’s not a friendship until after you’ve had a fight.
A simple friend expects you to always be there for them.
A real friend expects to always be there for you!
A simple friend will read and throw this letter away.
A real friend will keep sending it until he’s sure it’s been received.
Pass this on to anyone you care about.
“You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.” – Dale Carnegie
If we can say with confidence that we have 100 true, deep and meaningful friendships, then we’re blessed. But if we can say we have 3, 4, maybe 10…we’re just as blessed. Friendships are bonds and to have serious, inspiring relationships with any number of people is a prize, so treasure every real friend you have.
“Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” – Marcel Proust