Do you ever feel like one of the forgotten? One of the people sometimes overlooked in life? You should know that if you do, you’re not alone — every single one of us has, at one point or another, felt a bit invisible.
I had a friend growing up and he always said that he sometimes felt invisible, as if people didn’t really see him, but more just glanced his way and didn’t care to know him. When he told me this, I was conflicted, because for me, he was my friend and I saw him…I knew him…I connected with him, so what did he mean? He would later expand on what he meant and his experience and perception really gave me pause to think about how we all fit into this world.
Take a moment to read this story about a high school boy named Kyle:
One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was walking home from school. His name was Kyle.
It looked like he was carrying all of his books. I thought to myself, ‘Why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd.’
I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on.
As I was walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from him…
He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.
My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him as he crawled around looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye.
As I handed him his glasses, I said, ‘Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives.’
He looked at me and said, ‘Hey, thanks!’ and there was a big smile on his face. It was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude.
I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so I asked him why I had never seen him before.
He said he had gone to private school before now — I would have never hung out with a private school kid before.
We talked all the way home, and I carried some of his books.
He turned out to be a pretty cool kid.
I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my friends and he happily said “yes!”
We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.
Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.
I stopped him and said, ‘Boy, you are gonna really build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!’ He just laughed and handed me half the books.
Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends.
When we were seniors we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown and I was going to Duke.
I knew that we would always be friends and that the miles would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor and I was going for business on a football scholarship.
Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a nerd. He had to prepare a speech for graduation and I was so glad it wasn’t me having to get up there and speak.
Graduation day came and I saw Kyle and he looked great.
He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school… he filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I was jealous!
Today was one of those days…
I could see that he was nervous about his speech, so, I smacked him on the back and said, ‘Hey, big guy, you’ll be great!’
He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled….‘Thanks,’ he said.
As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began…
‘Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach…but mostly your friends….I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story.’
I just looked at my friend Kyle with disbelief as he told the story about the first day we met…Kyle had planned to kill himself over that weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn’t have to do it later and was carrying all of his stuff home. He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. ‘Thankfully, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable.’
I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment. I saw his Mom and Dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize it’s depth.
Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you can change a person’s life…for better or for worse.
God puts us all in each others lives to impact one another in some way. Always look for God in others. ‘Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.’
There is no beginning or end. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift.
– Author unknown
We all matter and we’re all valuable and worthy. No one is above us and no one is beneath us.
Every day, we encounter people who may be struggling and it might not ever show on their face — that’s why every day, we need to remember kindness and compassion first. Speak gently. Give people a break. Show empathy. Listen, understand and above all, love.
“Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people.” ― Roy T. Bennett
“Plant seeds of happiness, hope, success, and love; it will all come back to you in abundance. This is the law of nature.” —Steve Maraboli
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness…” ― Galatians 5:22
We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals in the United States. Learn more about the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline
